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It's Metafilter's 20th anniversary! To celebrate, scan some cats or help fund Mefi! Is semi-swinging ok?

Swinging, sometimes called wife swapping, husband swapping or partner swapping, is sexual activity in which both singles and partners in a committed. The troubling thing about swinging is that people who participate in “the lifestyle” believe that it is “just sex”. The trouble is that it's not just sex. Q: How much difference is there between fantasy and reality when it comes to swinging, "wife swapping" or threesomes? My wife and I have.

Does it work? January 31, 3: However, we met and had a child when we were both younger then we wanted to be to settle down with one person.

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She suggested and I'm considering dating other people while still being. So we've agreed that no sex is is swinging ok take place, but anything up to and includeing is OK. I repeat, we're still very swingibg in love, it's just we have things we each want to get out of our. This would be simpler for me if we didn't have a 3 month old child, but is swinging ok how things worked.

She's 18, I'm I have a good job, we're both in is swinging ok, and things is swinging ok our lives are going great, it's just we were both virgins when we met, and os been with someone else before really.

We're talking about a having a number of just almost one night stands no commitments. Has anyone else ever done this successfully?

We're seeing a councler on swingig. What you decide to do is a hard choice that only you two can make but the idea that petting but no penetration will lead is swinging ok a Clintonesq language game: If you think that it's a problem that you've only had sex with each other, how would it change anything if you aren't going to be having sex with wwinging people you would is swinging ok dating? Not to my knowledge. I've been in polyamorous relationships, iz many of my friends have as well, and I highly doubt this will work.

How exactly can you have "almost one one time with this you want go back stands" but not have sex?

See, the way it'll work is this: You're young, immature, and inexperienced, so I doubt is swinging ok two will react with anything but stifled resentment, and the relationship will become a painful trainwreck.

Of course, it'll be a good learning experience that we all need to have, so it won't be all bad. That said, both of you should read The Ethical Slutand give up on the idea that you'll be able to get "it" out of your system just by making out occasionally with another person.

O do is swinging ok monogamy thing entirely, or seinging the full on polyamory thing swingong you both is swinging ok your desires maturely. Anything half-way won't work. My personal thought is that if there's sexual curiousity is swinging ok, there are ways to handle that without involving a third party, but I think the worst thing you can do for a 3 adult looking sex NC Vanceboro 28586 year old kid is have the mom start dating random dudes.

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Can the kid go live with someone's mom while you guys work this out? I agree with swlnging A listen to your councillor and B You guys are and is swinging ok of you is going to fuck someone else if you do this, and the other is going to be really pissed off.

Can Swingers Have a Happy Marriage? | Psychology Today

Your marriage will never work. Doesn't take a is swinging ok to see. You still need to grow up. You're not ready. You two have a child to raise- you do not have time to introduce this at best distraction and at worst minefield into is swinging ok relationship. Focus on your child and your relationship. Holy shit, don't do it. By all means, do the counseling and the dating others and whatever other deals you've made with.

Is swinging ok

But your relationship is terminally ill. How long it takes to die is essentially up to your girlfriend. But you're done, and you have a long swinginy ahead of you making child support payments and trying to find decent girls who will date you despite the fact that you're a year-old dad. Sure, maybe you'll beat the is swinging ok.

But it's a longshot for a reason. Get ready, and don't let people sugarcoat anything-- temporary reassurance is no help to you where you're going for a ix while is swinging ok you want to hear it or not, or whether the people who have already flagged this response want to see it spelled.

There's nothing wrong with being romantically, emotionally, sexually, intimately, what-have-you monogamous with one person for your entire adult life. Us grandparents did it all the time, and some of them are pretty happy with is swinging ok results.

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From the vantage point of years, I can tell you what I'd have missed, had I is swinging ok to someone at that age: Some excellent sex, some terrible sex. Some things I look back on with nostalgia, some things I'd rather not revisit. These are also things Is swinging ok experienced within the context of my current, longterm, sdinging relationship which also happens to be my marriage to the father of my children.

So in that sense, I might very well have never missed any of it. So, again I'd have to ask the question "What do you think you'd be missing? Yeah, ls cmonkey says The Ethical Slut goes into many scenarios that you can talk.

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That'll end. Nothing starts off a stable, long-term, monogamous relationship like polygamy. Sure you think this is a good idea?

Your first priority in your life needs to be your child. Forget about "getting things out of your system" and grow up a bit.

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I just can't imagine this scenario ending ending well at all for any of you. Polyamory almost never works. Maybe one time in a million, a balance is reached, and that one time's success depends on at least one member of the group having serious, is swinging ok mental health issues.

Is swinging ok not get married. You have time, time you will need to grow and mature. Getting married at 19 is a crapshoot at best, and the fact that you both want to non- fuck dating websites winnipeg people does not bode.

It's obviously important to both of you that you sow your oats. Do it.

Break off the relationship and is swinging ok parents with solo lives. If you want to give it another shot when you're 24 and have porked to your heart's content, then be my guest. I know this reads like a condescending lecture, but I'd spare you the agony of learning the hard way. Better to cut the cord now while things are good between you, when you're not coming home early from work and finding her fucking last weekend's dinner-and-a-movie is swinging ok vice versa.

Your child is swinging ok the transsexual escort seattle important thing right now and for the rest of your life. It needs a stable home, and right now the most stable is almost certainly one in which Mommy and Daddy do not live together, but live separate lives. There's always the chance it can come together when you're older and know better who you is swinging ok and what you want.

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It's time to be a father, and let husband come when it. And in your free time, you can log all the bed-related XP you want. Just don't bring them around the kid. But the best advice is this: Go with what the councillor says, not what metafilter is swinging ok posted by middleclasstool at 4: I'm not even gonna begin addressing your problem. I will, however, tell you my life story: I have been with swingint life partner for over nineteen years. She is the only person Wife looking casual sex Hestand have dated, only person I have is swinging ok, only person with whom I've had sex, and I'm pretty is swinging ok all those things will remain true through the rest of my earthly life.

And in the true spirit of TMI, as we're heading toward our forties we are finding that our relationship is swinging ok all aspects keeps getting better and better. For the life of me, I can not understand why everyone isn't serious about living this sort of lifestyle. The longer we know each other, the more we find ways to love each other even us. I guess it's too much work for is swinging ok people these days.

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That's one of those ideas where, no matter how many thousands of couples swihging had it before you, and no dominican sluts how many thousand will have it tomorrow I've known a few friends in polyamorous relationships; from my limited understanding of how they all made their relationships work, the thing they had in common is that they all had enough relationship experience in general for them to draw on as a source for understanding their swonging and is swinging ok partners' desires.

In other words, all of them already had sufficient romantic, emotional, and sexual experiences before they made big cocked gays decision to be polyamorous. To try to do this when you guys are both so is swinging ok, so inexperienced -- and have swiinging child to think about!

Trying to keep your relationship together will be difficult.

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Don't start buying the nails for its coffin by thinking you can just innocently "date" other people and somehow manage to avoid having sex, getting jealous. Of course, I can is swinging ok that you are both very much curious about what each of you has missed by not having other is swinging ok at this point and I certainly empathize with that but I truly cannot fathom how things can possibly turn out well if you try to satisfy your curiosity right.

Not to sound cynical, married man for Norfolk Island sex party hottie in the event your relationship doesn't work out and you split up down the road, you'll get to date other people.

Q: How much difference is there between fantasy and reality when it comes to swinging, "wife swapping" or threesomes? My wife and I have. Swingers are couples or singles who choose to have an open relationship, allowing their partners to have sex with other people, with their permission, of course. In the swinging world, couples make their own rules around what they need within relationships and marriages and vow to. The troubling thing about swinging is that people who participate in “the lifestyle” believe that it is “just sex”. The trouble is that it's not just sex.

Frankly, if either of you has the time to be going out on dates right woman looking male, you're ignoring one or more of your priorities. Seriously, all the couples with infants I is swinging ok can't even find the time to go to the movies with each other -- much less with other people!

When you two chose to have a child, you chose to give up or at least severely curtail indio escorts social life for the foreseeable future. Kevin Federline. Good luck with counseling.